“All the good ones are taken.” How many times have you heard women say this? How many times have YOU said it? This statement reinforces a belief that you will never find love.
In this, the third chapter of “Women Seeking Men” I ask you to stop saying those words… never say them again. If you hear someone else saying them, know this, if you think or say or hear anything enough times it becomes a belief. That needs repeating and a highlight.
If you think a thought enough times you begin to BELIEVE it!
There are plenty of good men out there. It’s true, I’m proof. I’m sixty three years old and, believe it or not, I have seen what my bottom looks like. Still, when a man asks me out should I act like I’ve won the friggin’ lottery? Hell no, but plenty of women half my age do exactly that.
But I promised you a man-magnet story so let me tell you about a dear friend who has always been a man-magnet extraordinaire.
She had a nice face, pretty blue eyes, dark hair and lashes. She was tall and skinny. (Oh GOD I hope she never reads this) No boobs, no waist, no butt, yes she had long thin legs but they had no shape either… picture Olive Oyl… only with better taste in shoes.
Guys found her captivating. They surrounded her. She had newscasters, doctors, pro ball players competing for her… I am not kidding you… a fireman would have left a burning building just to follow this gal’s heat.
What did she have that most women lack? (I bet you think I’m going to say self-confidence) what she had was the belief that there would always be another man. She KNEW that men were an endless supply.
Her smirk said, go ahead… impress me, and they nearly fell over each other to do so. They might get a date or two but this gal wasn’t so easy to capture. It wasn’t long before she moved to the next one.
She simply wasn’t moved by the superficial. So when the ship’s captain followed her home after that cruise, she said, “So he’s an old guy who drives a boat, big deal.” One dinner and he was history.
Yes, she had lots of self-confidence, enough to care more about whether she liked the man… than if he liked her.
Most men, especially the handsome or accomplished ones, have huge egos. They are accustomed to women chasing after them. SHE asked the hard questions like, “Who are you, as a man?” or “What are your core values?” and most of those guys were lost for words. Truth is, guys often identify with what they do, what they have or drive and self-discovery is not their forte, so to speak.
And most women ARE impressed with what men have. No judgment here. I like money, power and fame, but when my friend chose a mate he wasn’t the richest, not famous, he wasn’t the most handsome. He was the BEST. They are still happily married.
I went home to celebrate their 40th Wedding Anniversary. She still has long thin arms and legs, but after three children and menopause she looks less like Olive Oyl and more like Humpty Dumpty.
We went to the mall and in spite of her age and belly; the men, even the younger ones were still checking her out. The gait of her confidence and that mischievous smirk were still an irresistible combination.
What did I learn from her? To love myself first and that NOTHING MATERIAL beats happiness and inner peace! I learned to never, never ever act like you are impressed with a man until he gives you a good reason to be impressed by him and always have fun.
Side note: One of the handsome men I’m seeing has an exciting career and drives a Mercedes. I make him park at the church and walk up the road to my home. I told him, “I don’t want you to frighten my neighbors with that big-assed silly car off yours.” We are going on two years, in spite of the younger prettier women who want him. “You’re like a bad penny.” I tell him, “You keep showing up.”
He thinks it’s funny and he comes back for more.